Life As An Intern
by darknessnl
Summary: Alex's thoughts during Shake Your Groove Thing. I recommend listening to Sucker by Damien Jurado while reading it.AlexIzzie One Shot


**Author's Note:** My second Alex/Izzie. My third GA fic. I think this one is one of the better ones.

**Summary:** Grey's Anatomy Alex's thoughts during "Shake Your Groove Thing". (AlexIzzie)

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Intern life can suck sometimes. I, of course, can prove this with ease.Carting around "tumor ladys",people with "towel", yes _towel_ syndromeand "ex-nurses" can really take a toll on you.You can say anything to the tumor lady even if you wanted to. Yeah, maybe it is her fault it got this bad, but she must be Iatrophobic (that's a fear of doctors). The woman with the towel inside her from a previous hospital screw up isn't much of a companion. How can you say anything to her, knowing that it was one of your colleagues, maybe even one of your _friends_ who caused her all this unnecessary pain. It certainly doesn't seem fair. Not to her, not to you. The ex-nurse one was really bad. Dr. Ellis Grey's old nurse, watching that woman die in her bed because the person you're screwing (yes, I _do_ know about that. I see everything.) didn't have the courtesy to tell you that she was only her to die, not to be helped. People don't come to hospitals to die, and yet somehow, every single day I see people coming to grips with the fact that they will, and sooner than they should. 

Girls I've dated, they don't understand. They can't get past my insanely configured schedule, my reserved demeanor and the people who I work with, so they know nothing about me. Hence the reason my relationships don't last. They seem to think that I'm cheating on them (like I'd have the time), they don't understand that the crazy hours they deem "impossible" are _really_ my hours. That I could get called at any time. That I may work later to get in on a surgery instead of coming home to them. But really, that's what this is all about. Sure, it's being selfish, but my fellow interns understand what I'm talking about.

That's the point I'm trying to make, I suppose. I'm trying to show that I understand why Meredith and Derek date each other. Why Cristina and Burke have frequent meetings in the closets across the hospital. It's not just because it's convienient, not just because you don't have to go out to meet anybody, it's because they _understand_.

They understand that the life of an intern is crazy. That we don't get much time to ourselves. That the hospital _is _our lives, our only social exisitence (and thats only during coffee breaks). The hospital is our only chance, isn't it ironic that that's true for most of the people that come in and out of here every single day. The only people who understand interns are the people who have shared the experience.

That's how I knew that night, when she came back inside after I thought she'd left for home, for her friends, for her party, for her guy. I figured it out, and it didn't take long. They'd split, that much was obvious, why else would she come back. It was the "why" that took me a little longer. It took me a few days. A few days of watching Derek and Meredith through the hospital window, get into his car and drive off, both smiling wickedly. A few days of walking past obscure closets and hearing things. A few days of looking at my life, my past, my parents, my failed relationships. They were over because _he_ didn't understand, they were over because she found something; something that necessarily didn't matter more, but something that had reason, a purpose. And when he didn't understand, she let it go. She let him go. It was over, and that's all I see them as now,over.

That dejected look on her face, the look that I'd probably had so many times before. The look of confusion, hurt, hate, betrayal, and yet, still she was overcome with understanding. The feeling was familiar, believe me.

I wanted to tell her, so badly, that I'd found the key. I wanted to tell her. Hold her. Tell her it was okay. Let her know that this wasn't her fault. It was a pattern. But I couldn't. Because then she'd know that I knew. Knew that I'd been paying enough attention to notice. But I had to let her know. Had to tell her that I knew why, that I understood. That I was here, and I would be. I tried to make it subtle when I passed her in the hallway.I think she said it best though.

"Life as an intern."

It definitely was. And there, between us, was a mutual understanding. Like I said, the only people who understand interns are the people who have shared the experience. And even though life as an intern sucks, I felt then, that it was about to get better.

"And lovin' every minute of it."

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**Author's Note:** Eh...not thrilled but I think it was better than my others. **This will stay a one-shot unless otherwise requested.** Leave a review. 


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